There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Randomize
