Do vagina's smell?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
