Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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