Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
