i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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