dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
