She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize