i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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