That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
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