Define "chronic" masturbator.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
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