summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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