when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
