so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize