it hurts more in the daytime
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
We got so high we made milksteak
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
True strength comes from lack of pants
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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