alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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