if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
