your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Randomize
