i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Randomize
