I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
