You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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