You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
