I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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