We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
