I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize