Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
