So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
