This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
