I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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