ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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