sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
