i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
