have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize