when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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