my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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