The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
How does it feel to date your dad?
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
