I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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