I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Randomize
