1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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