I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
