fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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