We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
