he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
