What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
