It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
