i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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