they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
