I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
