that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
