Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
