Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
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